The Voice in the Darkness

As I go about my day it seems there are times when I catch the sound of a voice not quite discernible. It is not always there, however, it comes to me often enough that it can be a distraction. It is not out in the open, not where I can easily see, but it is there none the less. It is, sort of, a voice in the darkness. It has a tinge of loneliness, maybe a little regret. It is a voice that whispers there is a need that is not being met. The haunting feeling is that it is a need I am meant to satisfy. But one I, all too often, find ways to ignore. The remarkable thing is, that it is still and quiet but I hear it above the noise of the traffic, the clamor of the mall, and the blare of the radio. The voice in the darkness finds its way to me in the brilliance of sunlight and the stillness of midnight.

I sometimes wonder if it is that "still small voice" Elijah heard in 1 Kings 19:12. But no, this voice lacks encouragement, at times it almost sounds desperate and wounded. In truth, I live in a world filled with wounded voices in the dark. The wounded soul who checks out my groceries, the man with the sign, asking for change, the child on the street corner wearing a coat five sizes too large. There is no shortage of desperate voices. Even within the doors of God's assemblies where believers gather to worship and praise there are the broken families and grieving widows. There are those who join us and wear their best face yet are haunted by addictions and wounds that never seem to heal. There are times, even for believers, when we understand how Israel felt. When it feels like God has led us into the wilderness only to abandon us.

In those quiet, and not so quiet moments, when that quiet voice comes to me, I try to imagine that the voice is meant for someone else. However, I know that is not so. At times, when I allow myself to be most candid, I know the voice is mine. After all these years the enemy of my soul still speaks through my own shortcomings, my own feelings of failure. My own memories of missed opportunities and words that I can never take back. The voice in the dark reminds me of  words my mind will never let go of. Words that are like festering wounds that were spoken decades ago. I would like to deny that the voice in the dark exists. I would like to say that I am beyond that. I would like to say that my spiritual growth after all these years has silenced the voice and my attention is solely on the needs of others. But that would just give the voice another thing to whisper in the dark.

The voice reminds me of the magnitude of the resurrection of my Lord and Messiah. I have life, for He has conquered death. The fear of a dark eternity is washed away in the light of His glory. He is risen and the voice in the dark is really a shadow with no teeth. However, it is still there. There are times it tries to be more vocal, more distracting, more condemning. Those times when the lie of the wilderness seems almost inviting. When one can rest in hopelessness and feel no responsibility for life. They are short lived. The Spirit simply reminds me that 1st John 4:4 applies. I am His child and greater is He who is in me than the disturbing voice in the dark. Even when that voice is my own.

We are reminded daily of a world that is lost and decaying. We may well be reminded daily of our weaknesses and failures. We will do well to remember Romans 5:8, "But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." We do not have to fix ourselves to be loved by Him. We do not need to defeat the voice in the darkness for our Savior has already brought us to the light. I believe the voice will always be there. However, I also believe I do not have to listen to the voice who condemns me. For I am in Christ Jesus, and there is no condemnation where I now reside.

I wonder if you hear a voice that whispers in the darkness. One that tries to discourage and condemn. I have little doubt that the voice in the darkness will call on all of us, from time to time. But the power of the resurrected Lord assures me of life. I no longer have to live in the darkness. When I rest in that truth, the voice in the darkness is robbed of his power. And I am free.  And so are you.