Even though I have done a few posts on my friendship and remembrance of Tom Earl I feel a bit compelled to write one more. To be honest, it stems from the odd question of "why" that has haunted me a bit. I think fondly of Tom and really do miss him. I miss what we shared together as two guys trying to walk along with Jesus and finding ourselves, all to often, a bit off of the straight and narrow only to be drawn back by the grace of God. What haunted me was the truth that I was not sure why I felt such a bond with this man. Sure we were Elders together. Served together. We loved our wives and children and shared some of the frustrations and challenges that go with being human. Yet, I knew that there was something more than that. I just could not settle what it was in my mind or spirit. I believe the Lord knew of this unsettled feeling and the disquiet that touched my soul. He found an unusual way to help resolve this odd heart issue.
Strangely enough, the answer came from the last episode of the television series, "Enterprise". I am a bit of a Star Trek addict. I own all the movies. I have viewed the original series numerous times. I moved on to the "Next Generation", "Voyager", and "Deep Space Nine". There was Captain Kirk, Captain Picard, Captain Janeway, and Captain Sisko. I have viewed the bulk of all these episodes. However, Captain Archer never caught my attention. Then we dumped TV and subscribed to Netflix. There before me was the complete series "Enterprise". My Star Trek addiction returned. How does any of this have to do with my friend Tom? Well, it brought into focus the difference between a trusted friend verses a friend I can trust. Let me explain.
I have shared with a number of people that I shared a trust with Tom that let both of us be real. It was not that we met weekly to share in that trust but simply knew, without a doubt, it was there. In the last episode of "Enterprise" the writers combined the cast of "Next Generation" with the "Enterprise" crew. Forgive me if you are unfamiliar with the Star Trek series, however, that will not be necessary when I get to the odd point of God's revelation to me through this episode. In the story Commander Riker is faced with a difficult decision to make. Counselor Troy suggests he visit the crew of the first Starship Enterprise to gain some perspective. He does so via the holodeck where he can interact with the original crew. In one of the last scenes Riker poses as the ship's cook and has a conversation with Chief Engineer Charles "Trip" Tucker, who is also best friends with the Enterprise Captain, Jonathan Archer. Trip is sharing his admiration for his captain when he tells Commander Riker just why he feels this way. This quote captures and answers the question that has hidden in the shadows of the "why" for Tom Earl. Trip says, "I can count on one hand the number of people I trust. [not like] I only trust you like you aren't lying to me or I trust you won't steal my money. But, I'm talking about the kind of trust where you know someone's not going to hurt you no matter what. Where you know they will always be there for you no matter how bad things get, You ever know anybody like that?"
Yes, Trip, I knew a man like that. There have been and are a number of people I trust. People that I know would never lie or take something from me. People that would support me and even come to my defense. But very few that would never leave no matter how bad things got. I have been in church ministry for over forty years and most of that time it has been pretty positive and rewarding. However, there have been a few times when the leadership of the church was assaulted and I among them. In many of these instances, men I trusted, walked away. They didn't desert me in particular, they had just had enough of the battle and left the conflict behind. Leaving me, and the flock they were called to care for, behind as well. Tom didn't do that. There were times when those who disagreed came after me with a vengeance that few knew. On the surface they played nice, but in private and covertly, they came after me and even my children with little thought to the damage they accomplished. In the midst of these times it would have been easy to walk away, but my trusted friend never did. He actually made the suggestion, on an occasion, that I find a new ministry and leave the conflict behind. But, I could never leave and break that trust with him either.
Trusted friends are not easy to find. Actually, it seems you just find each other. You never intend to, God just extends grace to let you know there is someone who, like Him, will never leave or forsake you. They do not ignore your faults. They help you become better than you were. Like Trip, I can count these on one hand and the hand got smaller with Tom's passing.
So thanks to Star Trek, I understand a little better what I have lost. Perhaps, it is better and more honest to say, it helped me know what I had found. A trusted friend who helped me move upward on the path to glory. He just got a bit of a head start on me. I'll catch up in God's timing. Until them I just have one more thing to be thankful for. A trusted friend, no matter how long it lasts, is a gift from God. Merry Christmas Tom. See you soon.
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